The Dr. Jesse Walker Show - "It's All About Relationships"
 
 

“After The Passion…Now What?”
Primary Book
Chapter One
 
The Ex-Connection
 
 
          After a period of several months and countless nights of loneliness, Bob decided to join an internet dating service.  He viewed numerous photos with seemingly few actual matches and finally decided to communicate with a beauty whose numbers showed an 85% match.  Thus the introduction and dialogue between Bob and Sally. 
 
          They communicated over the net for two weeks before deciding to meet in person for a date.  It happened, they did the traditional or usual and went to dinner at a nice restaurant.  The conversation and chemistry were both great as they hit it off or should I say on very well.
 
          Bob was employed as a Technician for a computer based company, while Sally worked as a switchboard operator.  They both talked of their dreams and aspirations for the future. 
 
          After having late night bedtime chats mostly over the phone for another two months, Bob and Sally decided to become an unspoken item.  Prior to their entering into a relationship, Bob cautioned Sally that his last relationship ended one year prior and that he was also still in love with his Ex.
 
          Sally now getting used to Bob’s being around and together experiencing incredible laughter, insisted he must be the one.  She told Bob she could make him totally forget about his Ex if he would just concentrate now on the two of them and the fun they were having.  Bob insisted this was not advisable and felt he needed more time.  Sally persisted and got her way.  Sally was accustomed to getting her way as being persistent was a part of her personality.
 
          As a matter of fact, she actually pursued her first boyfriend and got him.  She had a very high percentage in getting anything or anyone she went after.  She had gotten to the point of being spoiled with such behavior which leads to some major disappointments throughout her life time.  One of the good things about her persistence is, she would never let disappointments keep her back or bring her down.  Her pursuit of Bob was like her regular routine; though many a woman would think to approach a man is uncharacteristic.  She thought otherwise in this day and age, and often got what she wanted.
 
          In her eyes, there was something different about Bob that made her overly enthusiastic to pursue him although he made the initial communication.  In her mind, once she became locked on something, she had to have it.  There are those that may have felt she had a major obsession, she of course would beg to differ.
 
          There were numerous times while on their outings that Bob would share things with Sally about his former engagement and activities he had experienced.  Sally was not often accepting of this and would remind him from time to time that this was not something she wanted to always hear or talk about.  She wanted the conversations to focus more on the two of them and the future of where she wanted the relationship to go.  Bob would quickly apologize for getting side tracked, but Sally failed to fully realize that Bob was not over his ex as of yet.
 
          The relationship with Bob and Sally appeared to be going smoothly after several months despite Bob not truly being ready for it.  One day Bob had to attend a business meeting in another city, the very city where his ex-fiancée lived.  Bob and Sally spent a great deal of time together since he would be leaving in a day or so.  They made passionate love the night before his departure.  She told him that she loved him and he failed to respond to her in the same manner.  They spent the entire evening all through the night together.
 
          Upon arrival back in the windy city of Chicago, Bob could not help thinking of the countless memories he encountered here with the woman he felt was the ‘lady of his dreams.’  I can assure you at this point he was not thinking or talking about Sally.  His mind now was completely shifted to his ex fiancée.
 
          As he left the airport he could sense the smell of her perfume, the very perfume that was his favorite on her.  He enjoyed the smell so much that he would occasionally wear it to think of her throughout the day.
He settled into the hotel, organized a few things for the afternoon scheduled meeting and decided to grab a bite to eat.  At various times he would take a deep breath just to smell or once again experience a ‘touch of Chicago.’
 
            While having lunch at one of the shopping plaza’s a soft voice whispered in his ear with a gentle hand on his shoulder from behind, “Hello my dear Bob.”  Without hesitation he immediately knew the voice coupled with the soft touch of this particular hand.  Without hesitation, he immediately jumped up nearly causing his food to spill over into his lap.  He turned around slowly and nervously as though shocked, uttered a refreshed, “Hello.”  They both immediately greeted each other with a soft kiss just like old times. This was Bob’s ex-fiancée Trishia.  He asked her to join him for lunch and with pleasure she wasted no time in pulling out her own chair.
 
            They engaged in a bunch of small talk catching up on the last two years since their separation.  Bob could not take his eyes off of her as she smiled continuously with joy just to see him again.  He told her that he was in town for business and would be there for four days.
 
            She told him repeatedly how life had been miserable without him and how she thought of him often.  He expressed similar thoughts as his mind raced to find another conversation to prolong the time.  After a brief pause of about 30 seconds, he uttered words Trishia longed to hear, “How about dinner and a movie perhaps later tonight?”  Without delay she said in a proud voice, “Yes.”
 
            They hurriedly finished their lunch and exchanged information and the time and location to meet later.  She thanked him for lunch and kissed him romantically good-bye until tonight, leaving Bob’s head reminiscing in wonderland.
 
            It was now 2:30pm and Bob was running late for a 2:45pm scheduled meeting.  As he rushed to make the meeting he forgot to call Sally at 2:00 as he had promised and was usually faithful in doing so.  Unfortunately he did not have time because every minute counted to be at this important meeting.
 
          Sally was aware that Bob was to visit his former city where he had previously been with his ex-girlfriend of 7 years.  Nevertheless, she did not spend much time thinking anything out of the ordinary.  As 2:00pm came and went, Sally hoped that everything was going well for Bob and perhaps he got caught up with a meeting and that was justification for him not calling.
 
          Bob on the other hand, now in the meeting was in the twilight zone in his thoughts as he looked forward to the evening with Trishia, his old flame.  Finally, at 4:15 the meeting was over.  Bob packed his materials and equipment and dashed to get a cab across town to the hotel and prepare for his 7:00pm date with Trishia.
 
          Trishia also in her own world of twilight could not get over the fact that she saw her long lost love and today he is actually in the same town as her.  She called her best friend Monica and told her about the scheduled dinner date.  Monica knew how desperate Trishia was to see Bob again and now was her chance to make the very best of it in anticipation of getting him back into her life again, perhaps forever.
 
          Bob had been in his previous relationship with Trishia for seven years and is still very much in love with her.  Their spiritualdifferences are what lead them apart.  Bob and his ex were very much in love with each other and by no means wanted the relationship to end.  A heated argument over religious beliefs one day is what caused them to call it quits, but they never stopped loving each other.  Despite the fact they did not communicate at all, Bob thought of her daily and assumed she did the same.  There were numerous nights that Bob actually cried as well as in the daylight for that matter.
 
          He found himself still with issues about his ex that he did not get over yet.  In his often quiet time he would think of her and the joyful times they shared so often together.  The pain in his heart was still there as he missed her immensely.  He spoke with select relatives and a couple of his good friends about the situation and they all proved to be supportive.  This of course did not bring solutions to his problems of getting over her.  He even spent a great deal of time in prayer with seemingly no answer from above in sight.  Sometimes he would feel as though God were out to breakfast, lunch and dinner and did not have time to address his insurmountable problem.  He still remained faithful in his belief and felt there must be a lesson for him to learn.
 
          In his mind, tonight was not going to be the night for an education in learning this lesson, Bob was more focused on how good it felt to just see her again after all this time.  The thought of any guilt or ill feelings about Sally had not crossed Bob’s mind at this point as he seemed overly anxious to prepare and groom himself for his scheduled big evening.  He even had in mind the place to have dinner, a favorite of theirs of which they often frequented. 
 
          His watch was now showing 5:27pm and he knew he was cramped for time as he was usually prompt.  He quickly shaved, took a quick shower and dressed all within 20 minutes.  As he rushed out the door, he remembered he forgot to put on his special cologne he brought just in case of this type situation if you know what I mean.  Immediately he returned to the room and nearly took another bath in it.
 
          It was now 6:10 pm and the trip across town was at least 45 minutes by cab.  This is the very thing Bob did not want, to feel rushed, anxious and sweating.  Instead his desire was to be calm, cool, and collected.  He got on an elevator that stopped at every floor as he was coming from the 14 floor.  He kept thinking that he would be late and she may not wait for him because in the past she was accustomed to him always being on time.  Finally, he was out of the hotel and into a cab at 6:23pm.  Bob could now take a deep breath with a sigh of relief.
 
          Little did Bob know, Trishia too was running behind schedule as she had an unexpected guest drop in on her.  Her guest could see that Trishia was preoccupied in her thoughts although she insisted everything was fine.  After the hour progressed in Trishia’s mind, she decided to lie to her friend by telling him something unexpected had come up and she had to leave without a further explanation.  He said he understood and asked if he could assist in any way.  Trishia without hesitation told him an immediate no thanks.  They parted with an unusual cordial greeting.
 
          Bob reached the destination point of their scheduled meeting at 7:17 pm only to discover Trishia was not there.  He wondered several things in his mind, one of which, had she been there and left?  Did she completely forget or did something else come up for her? In any event, he felt the need to wait a little longer and give her the benefit of the doubt.  He left the hotel in such a hurry that he forgot to bring her cell phone number with him.
 
          It was now 7:37 and Bob still had not heard or seen her.  At this he started to feel a bit despondent and thought, ‘oh well,’ “this was too good to be true.”  He engaged in self-talk in asking a lot of why’s about what he was doing.
 
          Throughout this process, his phone rang, with a hurried gesture, he grabbed the phone and yelled, “Trishia,” only to hear a different voice on the phone; it was Sally.  “Um, Sally, with hesitation, disappointment, anxiety and fear in his voice, “I was just about to call you.”   Sally a bit surprised, disappointed, angry, actually mad because she had not heard from him all day long, asked; “What did you call me?”  Without hesitation, Bob uttered in return, “I didn’t call you anything, what are you talking about?” He asked. “I thought I heard you call me someone else’s name,” she said.  He immediately lied and said, “I was telling the store clerk I wanted to buy some tissue, and that’s probably what you heard.” Sally dispelled that and went on to inquire as to why he had not called all day.
 
          Now Bob was not the type to lie, well at least not regularly anyway.  He knew he was in some sort of trouble with her and did not take time earlier to even think of her let alone come up with some valid, justifiable, or reasonable excuse or frankly another lie. He simply and quickly responded by telling her he had meetings throughout the day and was extremely exhausted and this was the first chance he got to actually be still for a moment in preparation of calling her.  Part of this is true, after all, he did have a somewhat busy day thinking about you know who.
 
         They continued talking for a while to update things and Bob somewhat distracted told her he needed to get settled and prepare for tomorrow and he would give her a call later tonight.
 
          It was now 7:43pm and Trishia was trying desperately to get to the place to meet Bob.  She was in a cab stuck in traffic and in tears as she thought the man of her dreams once again may have slipped away.  With her unexpected guest showing up earlier she too had forgotten to take Bob’s number with her. 
 
          With only two blocks to go and still heavy traffic after getting on the driver’s nerves for the last time by previously insisting he take different routes, she decided to get out and walk or perhaps even trot.  In her mind all she could think of was, will she see Bob today or ever again for that matter.  All that was important in life for her was this very moment, a moment she has envisioned for nearly two years, a moment that she prayed that life would be fair to her just this one time; finally a moment of opportunity to at least be with the man that she so desperately loved even if it was just for one more night.
 
            As he decided to wait patiently for a bit longer, the time on Bob’s watch was now showing 8:10pm as he now felt she was not going to show up or he had simply missed her as she perhaps had come and gone.  In his mind, for the tenth time he felt the need to wait a little longer as this might be his only chance and he was willing to take this long shot.
            Finally, it was 8:33pm, no Trishia, now he was really hurting at this point.  As he held his head down walking away, he heard a voice from afar as though running towards him, Bob, Bob, hey Bob!  At first he thought his mind was playing tricks on him until the sound came closer.  He turned around and there she was, desperately running with the last bit of air in her lungs.  Bob had the absolute biggest smile on his face as he hurried towards her.  It did not matter that sweat was dripping from her forehead, they simultaneously…
 


 
 
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